Gajalakshmi Paramasivam

06 January 2019

Junior becoming Distant Relative through freedom

A young relative of Vaddukoddai origin, sought our blessings in the traditional form. We blessed the young lady and said that she had the right to access our common resources, to the extent she sought and received our blessings. More significantly, the young lady made up for what her parents failed to return. One who provides is senior and the junior who receives has the duty to respect, to the extent s/he received the services. Otherwise, the junior becomes a debtor. If debts are also not settled, they become permanent negatives/Paavam in that person wherever s/he goes – ultimately beyond this life – as genes.

Recently, Dr Laksiri Fernando shared with us the following message from Lord Buddha:

[He who sees dukkha sees also the arising of dukkha, sees also the cessation of dukkha, and sees also the path leading to the cessation of dukkha.’ – The Buddha ]

The way we interpreted the above message was different/diverse and each one’s is right to the extent of her/his Belief in Buddha and/or the issue concerned. In terms of non-Buddhists – the base is the ‘issue’ concerned.

As per the above, one who ‘sees’ a problem has the ‘sight’ of it happening again. Such a person would also see the path leading to cession of the problem. To me it means one who ‘owns’ the problem also identifies with the solution.

If we do not recognize a problem – then what happened  is not a problem to us. It may be to someone else. In the In the Colombo Telegraph article headed ‘Was Ms. Vijayakala Maheswaran Wrong?’  - author Nanda Wanninayaka states:

[Apart from the controversial and illegal part of “reviving the LTTE,” I don’t find anything wrong in what she talked in the rest of her speech. ]

One who is in government agrees to use the same measures as the government to determine rights and wrongs. Hence ideally speaking,  the LTTE would be marked Terrorists by every member of the government which Mrs Maheswaran was part of. The rest cannot be taken as a tiny project and marked right or wrong.

To most LTTE cadre – intoxication and enjoyment of sexual pleasures was largely unregulated – relative to the common educated Tamil. The author analyses as follows in this regard:

[What I do know is that the post-LTTE era has compromised the rigid law and order which had been implemented in the North by the terrorists. So, naturally, maybe the people might think that the “known devil” was better.

It was the same with the extensive substance abuse by the youth and the men at large in the North. ]

The missing part of the analysis is pre militancy period when the educated Tamil self-regulated her/himself and the family and the community. They suffered discrimination and recognized the pain. Not so the ‘Tamil only’ cadre. They would have suffered caste-based discrimination but majority – including LTTE leader practiced gender-based discrimination and hence would not have identified with the pain of race based discrimination in multicultural areas. One who experiences ‘Dukkha’ and identifies with it – would not cause Dukkha in that form to another. Truth bypasses the brain and such discrimination happens subconsciously. It is through post-war development work that I realised that such regulated conduct was like imprisonment to the communities that isolated themselves to be ‘free’ in their privacy.

Children brought up in natural environments would not find sexual pleasures a problem unless it is painful to them. Many of the women in my family married when they were below the current voting age. As per nature  - one who has attained puberty was no longer a child but ready to be a parent. Those of us who forego such natural pleasures to educate ourselves and expand our  through structures to form relationships beyond our biological connections feel the pain – due to our renunciation. These are built into our cultural pathways.

A government has the responsibility to include law that would commonly serve all cultures in the country. It is the duty of the respective cultures to assist the common government to do so. The common problem I noted at family level with isolated communities was that the parents lacked the commitment to be with their children. It could be because they did not identify with such being a problem/Dukkha  – which means they were outside the LTTE discipline – the same way junior castes isolated themselves from the senior castes. This has the effect of them thinking that they are ‘equals’. Juniors become distant relatives when they take Equal position. Then they do not identify with the Dukkha that the senior identifies with. That is how, intoxication and rape have become problems that the educated are able to identify with – this time as distant relatives because juniors are taking equal position.