Gajalakshmi Paramasivam – 24 Aug  2015

  

Freedom & Independence

Often politics is used to get into positions of power and those who equate Independence with Freedom often end up abusing the higher position power. Raising the physical enjoyment to the higher level to form common structures, principles and values leads to Independence of the  physical. Frequent use of Majority-rule tends to lead towards increasing production of outcomes / benefits at trading level. Unless some part of our costs / inputs are used to strengthen existing structures and/or to develop new structures, the excess gets wasted and/or gets distributed as handouts. Foreign Aid to Sri Lanka often has the quality of ‘handout’ because it does not go through ‘Common Structure’. Likewise welfare payments in Australia.

When the system requires contribution to Commonwealth of the system – the inputs and the outputs are elevated to the higher level. Our costs and / or benefits are more stable and reliable when they are passed through such a higher structure. In terms of Tamils – it is common practice for daughters to be given dowry. Sometimes these happen at the lower level and hence are called ‘donations’. The difference between Dowry & Donation is the difference between Independence & Freedom. Dowry is given by parents and/or others in higher positions in the family,  when a daughter gets married and becomes part of another family. This requires restructures in both families. It also confirms the share of Commonwealth the daughter was entitled to as per the ‘providers’ and/or as per the law – such as Thesawalamai in Northern Sri Lanka.  In the new family it goes towards a zero base start between the new bride and her husband who is expected to earn money and status from outside the relationship and the ‘home-group’. If this is the wife and not the husband – then the husband needs to bring in bride-price or respect the wife as the person eligible for higher status in their relationship. A relationship based on such Common Principles would always lead to realizing wholesomeness and peace.

A donation for the marriage to take place without consciousness of such endorsement / sendoff from the family of the daughter/wife – is an acknowledgement that she is of lesser value than her husband to be.  Recently a Vaddukoddai daughter left home without the blessings of her parents who were acting at trading level. As per my knowledge this daughter took care of her home as a home-maker – which released her mother to make-home for her working-son in Vanni. She started a relationship with the guy arranged by her parents but the parents changed their mind when there was an apparently  more attractive proposal. The daughter left home. My heart went out to her because she was entitled to higher structure and status than was allocated – as if she had eloped. Even mothers of daughters who had actually eloped with boys of their choice – were critical of this young lady. I called the grandmother and the mother of the young lady and explained to them that the young lady was entitled to a dowry and therefore higher common status when she started her married life. I pointed out the level of discipline and commitment demonstrated by this young lady and said it was the duty of the parents to give what they can in money-wealth taking into consideration others in waiting. The rest of her share I pointed out needed to be through respectful status allocated to her by her birth family and community. The marriage took-place a couple of days ago with our blessings also being communicated. If not for this leadership – it was highly possible that there would have been a big fight between the fighters in both families – with the girl’s family converting their debt to the daughter into a sin. Such debtors do not have the true qualification to bless others’ marriage. The girl leaving her parents despite following their rules – was like me leaving the University of New South Wales – despite performing highly in my job but where my seniors close to the Vice Chancellor – were performing at Trading level. I did not accept any send-off from those who failed to include my higher contribution – at least as structural level. I therefore felt the urge to include it in the National structure through legal process on the legitimate basis of  my entitlements as per Equal Opportunity Law.

One needs to have raised one’s contribution to the higher structural level and beyond to Energy level. Women who (like Minorities) often get less than their male counterparts but accept it as the way of the system and/or because they see their returns through others in the family – are called Shakthi / Energy by Hindus for this reason. The males (like majority) who respect women / minority as Equals – are naturally blessed by that higher Energy-power. Males in Traditional system, give form to Higher Consciousness by showing the Truth. Without the Energy that works that Consciousness – no relationship becomes wholesome. Majority may look ‘free’ but they would not be independent to show and to work the system. Minorities in turn would devalue their own status by reacting instead of raising experience to ownership level to become the invisible force that works every corner of the system.

Under the subjective system – juniors often pleased their providers without belief in them – for receiving more than their earned share of benefits where the providers were not strongly committed to common principles and values . Structurally this was built into the hierarchical system – so one would show respect for the other also to be eligible for common use. When this enjoyment exceeded that structured share – such juniors/voters/countries weakened themselves to permanent dependent status. They often changed the provider to show Freedom while, in Truth – they continued to move further and further away from Independence. Poorer folks, Beneficiaries and Aid Receiving countries – thus become less conscious of  their Sovereignty and therefore weaken their self-respect and self-confidence by taking shortcuts through money only donations without Common  underlying principles and values confirming someone’s Truth. Often this is covered up by showing more Freedom.

A Tamil Diaspora leader wrote to me yesterday in response from France:

‘So ma’am you are the well-educated lady asking the Tamils to live independent of the Sinhalese governments. Appreciate  your good work.’
As per my Research – this leader connects to Fundamentals when discussing the need of Tamils as a Community. Given that I do not have any official leadership status I identify with the above responder recognizing my contribution to  Independence as the Energy that works the system. Those who seek ‘Tamil Eelam only’ need to show separation from Sri Lankans in addition to ‘Sinhalese-only’. To the extent they were supported by Common Sri Lankan facilities and are yet to settle their dues – they would  depend on the official system dominated by ‘Sinhalese only folks’ Donating the status to show separation and freedom to make their own mistakes and correct them confidentially. Tamils who seek to be independent under One Sri Lanka – contributing Equally or more to the Commonwealth – would become / have become the Energy that works the whole.
Where according to the official system of Democracy – woman is required to be taken to be equal to man until known otherwise – but is allocated lower position – and the woman accepts it – and reduces her contribution to the Commonwealth to that level – the stature of the whole diminishes in value. Likewise when minorities continue to be dependent of governments that fail to fulfill the Democratic requirement to allocate Equal status to members of minority – until known otherwise on merit basis – merit being calculate from zero start.
If on the other hand, Tamils seek delegated powers – they like dowry  must come – through an appropriate structure – showing and confirming respect for the parent group which is duly allocated as a the new-subsidiary’s inherited status. Every member of the new group has the responsibility to show equal respect for those who remain in the parent group. Every member of the independent branch – be it Tamil, Sinhalese, Muslim or Burgher is entitled to take Equal status as the parent – but no more – however money richer the new/child  branch may become. The parent is the reservoir of the Commonwealth. That is when the new unit would acquire the power to feel ownership of their own unit which started with the blessings of the parent. Every ‘Sinhalese Only’ or ‘Tamil Only’ person who separates without settling her/his debt to the parent – distances her/himself eventually to lose identity and self-confidence. The less visible powers are greater challenges. Sri Lankans as a combined force have shown the strong possibility of the beginning of this kind of structure. Sustaining this is the current challenge for us all – with or without voting eligibility. Many of us were the Energies that influenced these outcomes